Gratitude Post - April 7, 2023

I'm grateful for slang!

Slang is, for all intents and purposes, a degradation of the spoken/written language that is being used.  Whether the slang comes from the initial speed which which a statement was made, or because the individual who coined the phrase was too lazy to use the correct terminology, or if it came about simply because of a locations dialect, which might stem from commonly accepted nicknames or because of the regularity with which another language is heard/spoken.  Regardless of the reason, ultimately slang is, more often than not, the use of a modified word or sound to convey meaning.

Personally, I love the very idea of slang since it displays the evolution of language in a specific area.  I'm intrigued by the why behind slang, and am really interested to understand the reason words like "ain't" were first used.  Especially for slang like "ain't" that is now accepted as word that can now be found in the dictionary.

But regardless of whether you love or hate slang, it's really a marvel that we're able to understand each other when slang comes into play.  For language to have any meaning or purpose, it needs to be accepted by the broader group.  The use of slang, however, flies in the face of that common acceptance and understanding as it asserts the intended meaning of the one, or at most the few.  It really is a beautiful reversed expectation that slang is understandable to most people!

Gratitude Post - April 6, 2023

I'm grateful for shadows!

Shadows are evidence of light.

I think shadows, more often than not, get a bad rap.  They're seen as the encroaching of darkness, the embodiment of the unknown despite the presence of light.  But from the opposite view, they're the evidence of and guarantee for light.  If there were no light, everything would be shrouded in darkness which is the absence of all light, and therefore there would be no shadows.

Shadows also provide an add dimension to everything we see.  Without shadows our depth perception of what's in front of us would be thrown off.  Without shadows the details and intricacies of the world around us, like the details of a watch or other piece of jewelry.  And without shadows there would be no shade to break up the sweltering heat brought on by the sun.

Gratitude Post - April 5, 2023

I'm grateful for Royal Albert Old Country Roses china!

This china, as seen in the image below, is beautiful, and it's my wife's china.

But, as I have come to learn, there are two versions of this china: the original from 1962, or the more recent version.  To the untrained eye (and I include my own eye in that category) the differences are barely noticeable, but to my wife they're blaringly obvious.

Now, you may be thinking, this really is nice china, and it's nice to know that you're grateful for it, but what does this have to do with the theme of the blog?  How is china a reversed expectation?

Well, there are actually two ways that Royal Albert Old Country Roses china is a reversed expectation in my life, and I'm grateful for both instances.

First, shortly after a move to a new townhouse my wife was unpacking her china and placing it on the display shelf we were using for it.  Well, in the move this case had been damaged, and the pegs to support the shelving were no longer in the correct place.  So, as too much weight was placed on those shelves they gave way and down came the china on top of my wife.  Luckily my immediate reaction was the right one, and I expressed concern and focused on the well-being of my wife who was sobbing uncontrollably.  I thought she had been really hurt, but no, she was crying about the broken china.  Apparently the original version of it is quite hard to find since they've transitioned to the newer version, and so it can only be found in antique shops and at estate sales.  She was crying because of the very real expectation that we'd never be able to find enough of the china for her to have the set that she had been building up for so long because of how hard it was to find it.  Well, I'm grateful that we found it and now have more of said china, and a new display case, than we did before the old display shelves threw in the towel.

Second, the general expectation is that good china is only to be used for special occasions.  When a guest comes over, that's when the china gets taken out.  If you have a fancy meal to celebrate a birthday or notable achievement, the china might make a cameo.  But other than those select moments in time, china is more the focus of a display than something that actually has a use.  Well, not so in our household!  My wife's mindset is that china is meant to be used, and so we use it regularly.  If a guest comes over or it's a special occasion, then yes we indeed use the china.  But we also use it if someone in our family has had a bad day and we want to show our general support, or we'll use it just because we're trying out a new recipe, or just because we want to celebrate something mundane, like being alive that day.  It's such a wonderful reversal of the expected use of china, and I absolutely love it!

Gratitude Post - April 4, 2023

I'm grateful for April showers!

We all know the rhyme, 

But for me, I expect them to also bring migraines.

Before my car accident I'd regularly get headaches due to changes in barometric pressure.  If a really big storm was coming, I'd get a pretty back headache.  Well, since my car accident, any barometric pressure leads to me having a migraine.  A storm hits, big or small, I'll get a migraine.  A sudden change in the temperature, either warmer or colder, I'll get a migraine.  A storm sticks around for more than one day and then leaves, I'll even get a migraine for it leaving.  It's not the most pleasant of experiences.

However, so far this year, the showers we've been getting since it stopped snowing haven't produced half as many migraines as I would have expected.  And that is a wonderful reversed expectations!!!

Gratitude Post - April 3, 2023

I'm grateful for General Conference weekend!

To begin, let me explain what a General Conference weekend is.  As a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints we are privileged to hear messages from the leadership of the church twice a year, every six months during the first weekend in April and October.  It's our belief that these men and women have been inspired by God to share specific messages that are meant for us today.  The entire weekend is a wonderful, rejuvenating experience that often leads to commitments to improve in one area or another, recognizing how those improvements can produce amazing benefits.

But with General Conference weekend comes a bit of an expectation.  I fully expect to be able to spend the time focused on the messages being delivered, and that the weekend will be largely uneventful, outside of the messages I get to hear.  That's not how this past weekend went.

I have a tradition of having gummy bears during General Conference, and so my wife and I went to Bulk Barn Friday evening to have the desired gummy bears ready for the next two days.  But we didn't really get anything else to make the day special which led to two rather interesting situations.  First, it led to me trying to make homemade potato chips using a mandoline slicer to create the slimmest slices of potato possible to then be rinsed in ice water, sprinkled with salt, and turned into chips in the microwave.  Instead, I sliced open my thumb.  We then proceeded to question whether a visit to the ER was required, and it really threw off our day.  Second, it led to us going back to Bulk Barn in between two of the sessions of Conference.  We didn't miss any of the speakers, but similar to the thumb slicing, it threw off the day.

What I'm grateful for is that General Conference was still uplifting, and I still went away feeling rejuvenated and energized to face the craziness of life.  Even though expectations for the schedule of what happened were reversed from the calm, no interruption idea, the expectation of the result was unaffected.

A Job Description Written for You

What's your ideal job?  And if you were to apply to that job today, would you be able to check every box for the figurative job posting checklist?

Job postings are written to describe the ideal candidate, the one the organization and especially the hiring manager dreams of.  But rarely does the hiring manager actually expect to find that ideal, except for when the posting is written with a specific person in mind.

I remember a few times where I saw a job posting that was so detailed and specific I didn't think they'd ever find anything even close to that ideal candidate.  In one case, I was actually really intrigued by the role and decided to throw my hat in the ring, for lack of a better term.  For me, the detail that the list of requirements gave led me to guess I wouldn't get the role since my experience and credentials were just a bit off.  

I was then surprised to learn of the full level of the futility of my application.

One of my colleagues heard that I had applied to this position, and she knew the hiring manager, so took me aside one day after work.  She tried to be diplomatic in her explanation and ended up dancing around the subject for about 10 minutes before I interrupted her and asked her to just spit it out.  She then explained that in that organization, when a job posting was as detailed as this one was, it means that it was written with a specific person in mind but they were still required to proceed with the posting to be able to say the individual hired was truly the best fit for the role, and that they had followed fair process in hiring that person.  I guess it's a practice that happens quite often in that organization, and indeed throughout the job market from time to time.  I've even heard of a few situations where the desired hire is the one that writes the job positing themselves, basically describing what they themselves bring to the table.  At the time, the very idea of this "fair process" hiring was a huge surprise, and it really shocked me.

But, as I said, I already thought my experience and credentials were slightly out of sync with what the job positing described, so I just shrugged it off and moved on to the next role.  And that's actually what happened.  The next role I decided to explore, I was invited to an interview, and shortly thereafter I was informed that I was considered the top candidate and that they'd like to move forward with my candidacy.  That's actually what happened time and time again.  I was on a streak!  

It actually got to the point where, based on precedence, I started to believe that if I was invited for an interview I could assume that I would be hired for the role.

That was my expectation.  And since this blog is about reversed expectation, you can probably guess that wasn't the case for that much longer.

Rather recently I became aware of a role that appeared to have been written for me.  Though it wasn't the case, I really thought that the "fair process" hiring I had seen earlier in my career was happening again, and this time it was in my favour.  I checked all the boxes, and there was only a single item on the "nice to have" list that wasn't also on my resume.  I felt like I had this role in the bag, and was really looking forward to this next step in my career.  Well, last week I was notified that they decided to move forward with another candidate.

It can be a hard pill to swallow when you don't get offered the job that was, for all intents and purposes, written with you in mind.

But it's also an invitation...  

It's an invitation to learn a lesson in humility.  And if you're wondering exactly what humility is, the definition I always turn to was a quote from a leader of my church, that "true humility means glorying in another's accomplishments to the same extent you glory in your own".  I didn't get the role, but someone else did.  And they were probably just as invested in the hope of receiving that job offer as I was, if not more so.

It's an invitation to re-examine.  I now have the opportunity to re-examine what I want from my career.  Is the dream job I thought I wanted what would in reality be best for me?  Or is something else in store that would be better, though maybe not what I expected (again with the reversed expectations)?  I also have the opportunity to re-examine my experience and credentials.  Is there another area that I should focus on to more fully display my skill sets and abilities?

It's an invitation to change, to improve, to revise, to move on, to expand.

Ultimately, it's an invitation for growth.

Now, I don't know what's going to happen down the road, and I know that I haven't fully accepted the invitations inherent in not getting offered the job I've referred to, but I am considering those invitations and exploring how to grasp hold of them.  And I do know that my life and my career doesn't stop here, there's more that I have to offer.